FB Chat

Just another casual conversation I had with my mom a moment ago on facebook chat. Thought I would share.

Katie Dwyer:
moooooomm
mom mom
mom

Mary Schumacher:
what
what
whaaaaat?

Katie Dwyer:
ahh THERE you are

Mary Schumacher:
you are just like gracie
she says Mom a hundred times too

Katie Dwyer:
and correction ** GRACIE is just like ME!
I came FIRsT1

Mary Schumacher:
oh, ok, you are first. you can be the leader of the whiners

Katie Dwyer:
ugh you have no clue how bad i need to wash my hair!

Mary Schumacher:
haha, um, gross.

Katie Dwyer:
the rest of me is clean at least, haha
im freakin hungry!!!

Mary Schumacher:
one day Fenna was brushing Libby's hair and Fenna said "you have something in your hair" and Libby said "it's ketchup"

Katie Dwyer:
LLOL

Mary Schumacher:
hahahahaha!

Katie Dwyer:
WHY!

Mary Schumacher:
I know! Libby was so casual about it. It's ketchup.

Katie Dwyer:
i love fenna. i think she has to stay
did you tell her mom that you're keeping her??

Mary Schumacher:
I should. I think we should keep her too

Katie Dwyer:
my baby boy will only nap ON me.. and its so cute that I dont even wanna put him down and actually do like.. dishes and sewing and whatnot (gotta sew a couple things for andrew)

Mary Schumacher:
:) they don't nap on you forever
but there will forever be dirty dishes and laundry

Katie Dwyer:
LOL oh mama

Mary Schumacher:
screw the housework, enjoy the snuggle

<3

Henry's First Halloween

Ok, I am going to cave and totally steal a brilliant idea from a friend! She writes her blog as if she's writing to her baby girl, and since Henry seems to be the ONLY thing I talk about, I might as well be saying all of this directly to him. Right?

HENRY! Oh my goodness, look how BIG you are! I can't believe how much you have been changing the past few weeks. To my surprise, you dont have any teeth that are actually showing yet! They are still JUST below the surface. I feel when they finally come through, you'll probably get many of them within a short time. You've sure been active lately. Maybe its all the solid food that you've been eating! Avocados are your favorite! I haven't given you any citrus fruits or meat yet, and I don't plan to for the next couple weeks (you'll get them once you're 6 months old). You had bananas and liked them but, the first time you threw some of it up, the second time you had a mild diaper rash, and the third time you got a rash on your face!! Not trying those things again for a couple months!

We went to Murrieta with Daddy to visit your gramma, grampa, and all your aunties. And Charlie, your cousin, of course. You had so much fun and gave Aunt Gracie BIG kisses. Aunt Lexie and Aunt Gracie were helping you learn how to crawl. You were pushing off Lexie's hands to get to Aunt Gracie. It was very cute and you were so happy to have people on the floor playing with you. They did such a good job that now you have been picking your entire torso off the floor, so that you're up on your hands and knees!! It shocks me EVERY time I see you do it! Its still hard for me to believe that my tiny little baby is now strong enough pick himself up.... Its only a matter of time until you teach yourself how to move your arms and legs so that you're able to crawl. Tonight you were on the floor with Daddy showing him how strong you are, scooting backwards! I think you were trying to go forward though.. you'll figure it out eventually!!

Today we went to the pumpkin patch because it's Halloween. We went with your friend Mathew Rippey. He is a month and a half older than you are, and you seen to get along pretty well. His mommy and I took LOTS of pictures of you boys, and he tried on your Halloween costume so that he could get some pictures being a dragon too! Look how funny you look in your costume :)

We had a good time. You were a very good boy, even though we skipped a nap! You are so lucky to have a mommy and daddy that love you as much as we do!! But I must admit, its pretty scary how strong and determined you are getting! You also have very long limbs for a baby.. I just can't imagine what it will be like once you start crawling all over the house. We're going to have to get a very tough baby gate for the top of the stairs and permanently attach it, so mommy doesnt have to put the other gate across the entrance to the hallway and hop over it a million times a day!

Love you so much, Hankymuffin, and I will be blogging again soon about all our adventures to come.

Cry it Out

After many, many nights of sleeping with my wiggly baby pasted against my back in my & my husband's bed (he is under water in a submarine), I decided to try the Ferber method, aka "cry it out," because I need Henry to start sleeping by himself in his crib. The transfer from bassinet to crib has not been easy... My goal is to be done with this by the time my husband gets home in a couple weeks. I am hoping to have Henry sleep-trained by then so that I can at LEAST put him to sleep at a decent time! Even if he still wakes up in the middle of the night, it would help if he went to bed at a normal baby bedtime instead of 10 or 11 or sometimes even midnight! Lately he has been going to bed between 10 and 11.

Yesterday was the first night of "cry it out" at the Dwyer house. It went better than I thought it would!! He cried for a total of less than 30 minutes and fell asleep before 10:30pm! I checked on him 4 times, and the 4th time he was sleeping! Tonight we will do this together... I will document what time certain things occur! Here you go:

9:36pm - i put him in his crib & gave him goodnight kisses
9:41pm - finally realized I wasnt coming back & started crying
9:46pm - crying stopped... afraid to check on him!
9:54pm - still quiet. checked on Henry - HE'S ASLEEP!!! PRAISE THE LORD!!

Holy crap! I am in complete disbelief... I am wondering if he will wake up and start crying again in the next couple minutes. I am going to finish this episode of The Office and check on him again... if he is still asleep I will re-cover him with the blanket (he kicked it off, didn't want to take a chance) and go to bed myself! WOW. Who knew!? I feel like this is too good to be true.

If he wakes up in the next few minutes I will take care of him and then edit this post!!

5 Months Old Already??

This is an email that I sent to my husband (he is underway right now). Copy & Paste is so much easier than writing an entire blog about what I just wrote in an email!

Enjoy!!

"Cant sleep! Writing another one...

Our little boy is officially 5 months old!!! Well actually.. not for another 16 hours... but anyway, I just wanted to go over some accomplishments with you! Hank has grown so much going from 4 to 5 months old.. it just really amazes me every day!

Lets see, he did lots of "firsts".. first flight (and second too), first wedding & reception, first tooth.. but i actually dont know if it counts because you cant see it! I can feel it every time he bites on my finger but its just a corner of his tooth and its barely poking through (he hates when i try to look at it)... anyway, he also has had several play dates and made some baby friends, he now likes Sesame Street and The WonderPets (as opposed to JUST yo gabba gabba), he can roll from back to tummy AND from tummy to back, he can almost SIT by himself!! I can prop him up and he can sit by himself for a few seconds until he decides to go for a toy or wiggle when he is excited! I cant wait to show you how close he is to sitting by himself! Its amazing (and scary, we might need to do more baby proofing)! He can even scoot and rotate himself on the floor. He can easily transfer toys from one hand to the other. He can jump in his bouncy jungle thing for like, 30 minutes and not get frustrated or tired! He can munch on his toes (and he does.. ew). He is very strong. He can support all his weight on his legs easily, he stands up holding my hands several times a day, it has become part of play time. He LOVES to hear me count slowly to five! even if I dont do anything when I get to five! Lol. Loves being tickled on his sides & ribs! Loves to play peek-a-boo when he is in his jumpy thing and "where's mommy" when he is in his crib (i duck down where he cant see me). Loves being "super baby." First turd! I know talking about baby poop is weird but he has been pooping actual turds (stinky ones)! And thats because he has had his First Solid foods! He has eaten rice, peas, squash (his favorite by far), and today avocado! I am going to have to find some organic squash somewhere! I took a video of him eating avocado today, its cute. First story time at a library (that was fun)! First time being babysat by someone he didnt know at all (jenn when i went to the casbah). First time getting sick :( First time going to the ER :( (hopefully the LAST! ..yeah right). He can say more consonants and can blow spit bubbles. He only eats about every 4 to 5 hours now! Its pretty awesome. I can get several things done sometimes before he is hungry again! Took his first bath with other kids in there with him (aunt gracie and aunt libby). And now I HAVE to give him an interesting toy when I change his diaper or else he will get very upset with me for blocking him from his toes. He also tries to roll off the changing table now. He has a "bedtime routine."

His bedtime routine:
- eat dinner (baby food)
- quiet play time (we sometimes skip this one, depends what time it is)
- bath time, then pajamas
- mommy milk
- crib for the night

Well, you got a pretty good Henry update! I think you now know about as much as I do! I just feel like I need to tell you a lot because "just turned 4 months old" Henry is so different than "just turned 5 months old" Henry is!! I need you to be prepared when you get back, or at least I want you to know what to expect. We both love you so much. Goodnight sweetheart. I am up way too late now..."

And an update on myself - I have lost all my pregnancy weight with the exception of like, 3 pounds. But pretty much all my old clothes fit, so yay!! I am just picky about shirts since I am still breastfeeding my little one. I started training as a DOULA!!! I am REALLY excited about it. I really think I will be good at this. Maybe I shouldnt have said I'm "training" ...I am reading. Just reading. But in November I have some classes and after that I will be a "trained birth doula" and can start attending births to get my certification! It feels good to be working toward a career goal. Especially a flexible one like becoming a doula. I have always been spontaneous, I think I can handle being "on call" for pregnant women all the time, just as long as I have a babysitter! I will update you on my doula stuff once I've taken the workshop classes.

4 Months Old: Bassinet to Crib

I don't have much time to write full blog posts lately. So I've decided that I will copy and paste information from emails to my husband, facebook messages, and online chats with my mom (like this one) so that I can still keep this information and update you (whoever you are) on baby Henry! Good idea?

So just so you have some background.. Henry is now 4 months old and I am finally admitting that he is too big for his bassinet. :( I've started trying to have him sleep in his crib in his own room, which is right across the hall from mine. ...This is how its going so far:

[Me]
ok seriously i am having issues with the whole crib thing!! he doesnt like it!
:( gahhhh
he is crying right now... i am REALLY hoping he'll just go back to sleep
[Mary Schumacher]
oh no
[Me]
it really sucks.
[Mary Schumacher]
what if you sleep on the futon while he falls asleep
[Me]
.... why would that make any difference
[Mary Schumacher]
then you'd be in the room while he falls asleep and he'd sense you are right there
[Me]
LOL
idk mom.. i put him in his crib to fall asleep. he fell asleep, then woke up 10 min later and started crying. i rocked him to sleep and put him back he is now awake again crying. is this going to just continue forever?? i rock him to sleep, set him down and 15 min later i am doing it again??
[Mary Schumacher]
give him your sweaty tshirt to sleep with then he'll smell you and feel comforted
[Me]
YOU HAVE THE MOST RIDICULOUS SOLUTIONS!
[Mary Schumacher]
LOL
people do that!
[Me]
i hold him and he's instantly sleeping again
grrrrrrr
[Mary Schumacher]
oh just sleep with him. He'll move to his own bed in a few years. Gracie and Libby sleep in their own beds now. (sometimes)
[Me]
LOL uuugh...


& just so you know I really did give him a tshirt.. not sweaty, but i wore it! Wish me luck!

Grandmas, Food, Babies, etc...

Pretty much everyone uses facebook now. Its just convenient for staying in touch with friends and family who aren't close by. And even the ones that are and are just too busy to catch up on a regular basis! Anyway, the other day I asked my grandmother over facebook what her mom (my great grandmother) eats on a regular basis. I have watched a few food documentaries lately and since my great gramma is 103 (or is it 104 now?) I decided it was a good question!! I have also recently decided that I would love to stay alive to see my children's children's children's children!!

Please ignore the fact that I look like a giant whale. This is my gramma, my great gramma, my mom, my sister, charlie (her baby), and me and Henry. So it is all five generations!

Anyway, this was my Grandma's response to my question about what Great Gramma eats:

"Gma eats ordinary food. No nuts, or anything hard to chew. She has her cold cereal every morning with a little milk and sugar, and her cranapple juice. We eat our big meal at noon. Then usually just have a bowl of Moose Tracks ice cream for supper with a cookie. She eats a lot of chicken and fish with potatoes and gravy and a roll. Some mornings we fix eggs and sausage with toast, or pancakes or frozen waffle thingys. Sometimes we fix those things for lunch just for a change. She eats hamburgers now and then. She likes lamb chops but we don't have those often. She doesn't care for Mexican foods, Italian, or Oriental. When she doesn't feel well she eats burnt toast to help settle her stomach, or milk toast with tea. In other words she eats whatever she wants and ignores anything she doesn't care for at the time. She has no special diet."

I thought it was funny for some reason. :) And also a bit relieving.. because I have been so concerned lately about organic foods and what is healthy for Henry, whats not, that its nice to know that you can live a long healthy life just by eating foods that you like and that make you feel good. I will just try not to purchase too many foods with pesticides, growth hormones or too many "enhancements" and I think we will all be fine!

Henry update.

The picture is my sister Gracie (5 years) and Henry (3.5 months). The girls love him SO much. Its very sweet.

In one week, my little Henry will turn 4 months old. This week he's suddenly making so much progress developmentally! His hand-eye coordination is really good now. He can pretty much grab anything within arms reach, and quickly too. I can tell that his depth perception is getting better because when I hand him a toy his hands used to try to grab in front of or behind it and he'd have to search for it through the air a little before actually grabbing it, and that process has almost been eliminated now. He can also ROLL OVER now!!! Yay! Two days ago he rolled over from his back to his tummy (over his right arm) and has been practicing ever since! The only problem is that he can't roll from his tummy to his back, which is funny because I've read that most babies figure out how to do that first. He has always hated tummy time until this week, after he learned to roll over. And now that he doesn't mind, we play on the floor all the time! In fact, I am laying on the floor with him right now.

I just measured him from the top of his head to his heel - 27 inches! Wasn't expecting that! According to the internet that's well above the average baby's 4 month weight. And I don't know his exact weight but I'm going to guess its around 16 pounds. He has a doctors appointment in a few days so I guess we'll find out then. I also purchased a high chair and I've fed him rice cereal with a spoon three times now! He seems to like it. I will probably just stick to breastfeeding while he's sick though.

We are both sick today. My poor Henry is teething, has a runny nose, and plenty of boogers. :/ And I can only assume he has a headache, because I sure do. I'm pretty sure he gave it to me actually, because I noticed his runny nose before I felt a thing. I'm going to go to the store and buy this "vapor bath" stuff for him and some cough drops and chicken noodle soup for me! If I make it out of the house, that is...

And Daddy is gone. He's been gone over a week and we've still got over a week to go, but I've been emailing him a lot. I think he'll be really excited to come home to Henry since he has so many new tricks to show him! And of course he is always growing. growing growing growing. Why do they have to do that anyway??

Rambling...

In three days my little lovebug will be TWO months old! Even though he has grown SO much (and I've shrank so much) its still hard to believe that 2 months ago he was still inside me. Time is flying by SO quickly! Its really getting to me, the fact that he is growing so quickly. Just stay little for awhile!! Being a baby isn't so bad.

He has been really great about sleeping. He stays up until 11:30 or midnight (sometimes later) and then sleeps in until about 5. Yesterday he took a nice long evening nap, giving Andrew and I enough time to make a FEAST of food for dinner AND watch almost half of a movie! I had to hold him and feed him during the movie and once I was done, BOTH my boys were asleep and I watched the end by myself, haha. Today he woke up more around 4am but he'd gone to bed a bit earlier than normal so I expected. Anyway, it was nice to have some time with my husband! I feel like I never get any time with him anymore. He is always working on our album in the band room or playing a video game or working out or helping clean the house, and thats when he's not actually at work! And when we do have time to spend, the baby is awake and wants attention... But yesterday was good. And I'm glad that it was because it was the last day of stand down (dont ask, its navy talk), so starting today, he goes to work every day. I dont know how long his hours will be, don't even know when he is coming home tonight, but he said he'd call at lunchtime, so thats good.

Although the sleeping has been going wonderfully, my little muffin has suddenly become a crabbier baby this week! I dont know why, maybe he is gassy or has more boogers than usual... not sure. But he's been crying more often during the day and its making daily chores and errands more difficult! The only way I can fix the crying is by holding him close, rocking him, talking to him, and walking around with him. Its like he just wants extra attention. No setting him down to do the dishes or laundry! Luckily the moby wrap that my mom handed down to me has been working for an hour or two at a time.

Today I opened a new package of three pairs of socks for him. They were sized 3 to 12 months old, but he didnt have any others clean. To my surprise, they are quite snug!! He has giant feet more being almost 2 months old. He is about 23 inches long and 12 and a half pounds. But maybe I should weigh him and measure him today, because when I picked him up this morning I swear he was bigger than when I laid him down last night!

And last on my list of things to talk about - MUSIC! 50/90 started but idk if I will participate. If I write anything I suppose I will post it. And thats only if I get a decent recording, which is not looking too good since Andrew got all this new recording equipment. Our home studio is really looking awesome! I am so happy with our band room. I wish I had more people to play music with in there though. I'm picky about who I like (personally & musically) and who I trust around our music stuff. Anyway, I started performing again!! First time was just singing back up for Celia at House of Blues downtown. Next I performed my own set a couple days ago at The Stage (also downtown in the gaslamp). It didn't go all that great! I didn't practice because it was a very last minute invite and Henry was fussy. I almost didn't go but Andrew made me. I forgot my song book, and since I didn't practice, I really wish I would have had it! I did probably 8 songs, but after 5 I was ready to be done... But Celia and I got $15 each in tips so I couldnt have been THAT bad! haha. More music - Scott West asked if I wanted to sing back up in the Scott West Band at his next few headlining gigs, but I can't really say yes, (1) because he never told me what dates he's playing and (2) because even if I knew the dates, who am I going to get to watch Henry from 8pm to 1am on random nights, probably weekends!? And thats not even considering the fact that I am NOT okay with anyone except me & drew watching him!

Well, the baby's awake! Gotta go.

baby update!

Henry has been smiling for quite a while now. When he was only a week old he started smiling in his sleep. He did it often and sometimes would even giggle! Always made me wonder what he was dreaming about. :) For the past couple weeks he has been smiling while he's awake, smiling at people, mostly me of course.

We have TWO games to play together! We play peek-a-boo, and as of today we have a new game. Don't know what its called... I think I'll call it Stinky Feet. He lays on my lap with his head near my knees and I lift his feet to my nose and smell them and say "PEW!!" and he smiles!! Can you believe that my days now consist of quieting cries and finding ways to make

Its strange, I've never loved to see a smile so much before! The closest feeling I guess would be seeing my husband smile on special days. Really special days like the day he proposed, or the day we got married, or the day we found out I was pregnant, or the day HENRY was born! Or any time that Drew smiles at Henry. I just love my family! Its amazing. Its like one second I have a boyfriend and the next I have a beautiful, concrete family. Sometimes I wonder how it all even happened!

Anyway, its been very exciting to see some smiles. There's an emotional tole of suddenly having to spend EVERY second taking care of someone else, someone who cries ten times a day and can never tell you what they want. An appreciative smile sure is nice to see after hours of holding, cuddling, singing, bouncing, feeding, changing, and any other thing I can think of to cheer up a grumpy baby!

Some of my favorite things about Henry:
- he falls asleep during car rides
- he started biting & sucking his fists, which might not seem like a big deal but its self-soothing and it means he's gaining coordination.
- he started sleeping through the night.. kind of. He now sleeps from midnight to 6, give or take an hour.
- his eyes looks prettier every day
- he looks so much like his daddy's baby pictures
- he smiles for his dad
- he has so much hair!!
- the moby wrap puts him to sleep right away
- he's starting to stay awake for longer stretches during the day
- likes staring at dangling toys and kicking

Well, time to change his diaper and put him to bed. Its a "duty day" which means Andrew will be working all night and come home in the morning. I let Henry sleep in our bed on duty days. He likes to sprawl out and take up as much space as possible. No swaddling for this little guy! Goodnight.

My baby is SEVEN weeks old today. He is so precious. I gave birth to him on May 14th. I had a very long labor. On the afternoon of May 13th I went to the hospital after two and a half hours of contractions that were three to five minutes apart. They checked to see how dilated I was and I was only ONE centimeter. It wasn't good news, but I wasn't too surprised by it. I was, however, a bit more effaced, so it was good to hear that after all those contractions SOMETHING was happening... My contractions stayed very close together all night long and got way too strong to sleep or even rest. My husband, Drew, started massaging my back through the contractions after they got too strong for me to get through on my own. I labored ALL night with him and finally went to the hospital around 10am the next morning. When I got to the hospital they checked my cervix again, this time I was four centimeters dilated and completely effaced with a "bulging water bag" (which I guess is why it felt like I couldn't even sit down). Amazingly the day flew by. The contractions were very strong but it seemed like once they had me all set up in that labor delivery room, time was flying by and I was making lots of progress with each contraction. I had terrible back labor... My poor husband gave me a 24 hour back massage. My back hurt so much that my tummy didn't hurt at all, or maybe it did, but the back pain was so strong that I couldn't feel anything else. I kept waiting for the pain to get worse and be "unbearable" but it turns out I can tolerate quite a bit of pain! There weren't any contractions that I couldn't breathe through or talk through, and once the "pushing contractions" started, the back pain seemed to be going away. The pushing contractions were relieving after all those hours of doing nothing but laying there in pain! I wouldn't say I was any more comfortable, just a very different kind of uncomfortable than I had felt before I guess. And after an hour of pushing, Henry was born! My husband and my mom were both a HUGE help. I also had a FANTASTIC nurse (or maybe midwife, helper, idk, titles arent important!). She was only in the room for half the time and when she was she seemed very understanding and only gave helpful suggestions, never sounded bossy or irritated. And everyone seemed pretty impressed with me for doing it without any meds!! I didnt even take a tylenol! Afterwards she put something in my IV though because I had to sit there for a LONG time getting stitches and whatnot. Another amazing thing about Henry's delivery was that immediately after he was born, when they handed him to me, he was very clean looking. He looked like he has just come out of a bath tub, not all slimy and nasty like most babies in movies look. He was also HUGE... eight pounds and fifteen ounces! Almost a full nine pounds! It was strange to be holding a baby that looked too big to have ever been in my tummy! I wasn't expecting to have a little five pounder, but with everyone telling me I looked "small" through my entire pregnancy, NINE pounds was not expected!

Interruption: Henry is laying next to me on the couch and Andrew is sitting on the other side of him. Drew just had a MASSIVE man sneeze and scared little Henry half to death! Poor little guy jumped and started crying!

Well, Andrew is transferring files to a new computer so I have to go! Lots more updates to come. :)

A Quick Rant....

As a songwriter, I try to respect other songwriters - no matter how talented or famous they may be. So naturally, one thing that really bothers me is when a musician plays a song by someone else, and doesn't give that person any credit for the song! Lately I've been noticing more and more people performing covers at open mic nights and letting the crowd think that it is an original song, or even worse - leading them to believe that its their own original song - and never mentioning later that it was a cover! Why does this seem to be a growing trend? In fact, it has probably happened more times than I've realized since there are so many songs out there that I'm unfamiliar with. I'm not against people covering songs; in fact, I think it can be beneficial for musicians to learn covers.

It should be common sense to acknowledge the original artist and give them the credit they deserve. Its the least you can do if you are using their creation to benefit yourself, whether it be compensation, popularity, or the personal joy and sense of accomplishment you got from learning it. As a songwriter, I would hate for someone to use my song for their own gain and then not give me credit for creating it!

Its gotten to the point where I have come very close to exclaiming, "Nice COVER of that song! Gotta love *insert band name here*!" because leading people to believe that a cover song is your own is a very selfish thing to do. Lets all learn some manners and stop stealing, please.


...with that said, here is a cover song that I decided to record today!

8 Months Pregnant & Still Rockin' It!

I am thrilled to announce that my pregnancy has been going very smoothly all this time. I feel like my body was made to do this! Hopefully I don't change my mind when it comes time to deliver! Don't get me wrong, I have had many pregnancy symptoms, but nothing too painful or irritating to stop me from exploring my new home of San Diego and doing what I love - which is making music, of course.

My new guitar has been treating me good. I still have that I-can't-believe-I-own-this feeling, but on the flip side, I feel more professional and SHINY when I'm on stage performing. So of course I have been playing lots of shows. The funny thing is that I haven't really been trying to book shows! After the first few, people just started offering to book me at different venues around town. Its also nice to have musician friends. Celia St Croix (check her out at www.celiastcroix.com) has become a close friend, and since we're both singer-songwriters we attend many open mics together, play the same venues, and share venue gossip (we are girls ya know). Other San Diego performers that have helped me along the way include Brain Bosen, Craig of Suede, Jimmie Lundsford, Robin Wilbanks, Rod Worth, Sindi Somers, Mario Armando and many more that I'm sure I'll regret not mentioning!

So far I have performed shows at Portugalia Restaurant & Venue in Ocean Beach, Rebbecca's Coffeehouse in South Park, Cafe Libertalia in Hillcrest, Lestat's West open mic in Normal Heights, Kadan's open mic in North Park, The Stage Bar & Grill downtown, and last night at Bar 11 in Normal Heights (loved this little bar). And yes, even at eight months pregnant, I have more shows scheduled for this month! This Friday, April 8th, I'm playing at a coffeehouse on the UCSD campus in La Jolla called Muir Woods Coffeehouse and according to the facebook event, about 50 people are going to be there! On April 21st I am playing a show at Winston's (another venue I've never been to yet) with Celia, and on April 23rd I'm performing at Cafe Libertalia, opening for Ukulele Ray, a comedian musician from Las Vegas. I might be setting up a last minute gig with Chad Taggart and Jaron Eldon at Claire de Lune Coffee Lounge sometime this month, but we haven't heard back from them yet, so we will see what happens.

The funny thing is that last month I was telling everyone that I wasn't scheduling any shows in April (and obviously none in May since my due date is the middle of that month), and now I am still feeling great and craving music! Last night in fact was very exciting! After playing coffee shop after coffee shop, it felt so good to bust out a few of my louder, rowdier tunes for this little dive bar! Everyone seemed to enjoy themselves, and I handed out many demo CDs after my performance. I also enjoyed the other performers that were there, and Brian and Craig (the hosts for the night) have decided with the bar tenders and sound guy to make this a bi-monthly event! So I'm sure that I'll be invited back to play there again someday.

But back to my point - since performing still feels great and my pregnancy hasn't slowed me down, I don't think I will have any problem continuing performing right up until my due date!! And if my water breaks on stage... that'll just make it all the more interesting, won't it? ;)


p.s.
Go to Facebook.com/KatieDwyerMusic to see some recent photos of my performances (unfortunately most are cell phone quality, taken by audience members - still awesome though). MusicologySD.com is a website designated to helping San Diego musicians! My interview and performance was filmed Sunday night and will be up on the website TOMORROW night - Wednesday, April 6th. So watch it!

Ordered a New Guitar!

Since I have been playing so much music around San Diego lately, I've started looking at other musicians' guitars and thinking about my own. I do love my guitar. Its the second guitar that I've ever owned, and I've had it since I was 12. My Dad bought me my first guitar when I was nine years old, and to be honest, I don't really remember it... so maybe my current guitar counts as my first guitar. Its a maroon Takamine acoustic with a black pick guard. Its pretty basic. I think that over the years, the action has gotten worse. It's not an electric acoustic, so I use my dad's old pick up when I play live. I love that pick up. It says Lawrence on it and I doubt they make it any more because I've never seen anyone else using one.

Anyway, after playing a few of my friends' nicer guitars, I realized how much work mine needs. And after several emails to my husband I decided it was time to get a new one. I am going to keep my old one of course. I looked online and read all sorts of reviews on different brands and styles, but I did have a particular style and color in mind. My singer-songwriter friend, Celia, and I went to Guitar Center to look at their high-end guitars, but they didn't have one that I had seen online and really wanted to try. I played a bunch of Gibson Hummingbird guitars, since the one I was looking at online was in the same category. I played a Taylor and a couple Martins also, but there was something about the Gibson guitars that made me like them better.

I left Guitar Center more confused than before I walked in! Especially since I never got to play the guitar I was most interested in. Anyway, to make a long story short, after several more emails with my husband, I decided to just order the heritage cherry "Artist Acoustic" Gibson Hummingbird Guitar! The website I ordered it from has a 45 day guarantee and unless I wanna drive to Sacramento, thats the best way to get a hold of this guitar. Andrew thinks I'll love it too much to send it back. And he's probably right because its basically the regular Hummingbird guitar (which I love) without all the swirlies and the bird printed on the pickguard (which is perfect because I like the regular pickguard way better). It has the same electronics and body shape.

It was shipped out today and I'm expecting to get it on Wednesday or Thursday! It could come on Friday but I'm crossing my fingers it comes earlier because I have a show Thursday night at Portugalia in Ocean Beach, and it would be SO fantastic to play my new guitar for the show. I hope its all that I think it'll be.

2.5 months down...

Well, its been two and a half months, and I am still doing great on my own! My husband and I have been able to keep in contact, more contact than either of us had expected going into this, and it has been a tremendous help. I send him an email every day (sometimes more than one) updating him on pretty much every aspect of my life, which he enjoys because the emails are pretty close to the only social life he has right now.

Its amazing to me how much I wanted to get a job when we first moved here. I really thought that if I didnt have one I would be completely bored and have no way of meeting people and making friends, but it seems like I should be thankful that I didn't get one! I have a lot going on, balancing my doctor appointments, making sure the bills are paid, my music life, helping plan my baby shower, and my new friends here. I feel like every day I have at least one thing on the to do list, and at thirty weeks pregnant, sometimes one thing is all you have the energy to do! If I had a job, I wouldn't have the energy or the time to pursue music to the extent that I have been lately. Life is so much better with plenty of music in it.

The sub has only stopped at one port since he first met up with the boat two and a half months ago, so we got to talk on the phone a couple times while he was on land. Its amazing what a phone call can do! Its also amazing that he can make me that happiest girl in the world even when we're on opposite sides of it.

Its still unclear whether or not he will be home for Henry's birth. Chances are still looking very slim. But this is ok with me. I'm thankful that we got to move back to southern california, and I'm thankful that he got the job he wanted, so if we don't get to be together for Henry's birth, I can't complain that much about it... We are already lucky in so many other ways, even though its one of the most important days of my life, it would be selfish to ask for too much more.

5 days down...

My husband has been gone for 5 complete days now. For the first couple days I suddenly felt very abandoned. The funny thing is that I never felt abandoned by my husband, I felt abandoned by everyone else!! All of our friends knew that he was leaving, and I received no phone calls or texts or facebook messages... I was really sad. My mom and I chatted online, and Andrew's parents called me and texted me to make sure I was ok and get updates on their son. But that was it. I even tried calling a few close friends and they didn't answer, which immediately made me feel worse, like they didn't even want to talk to me. I was probably annoying them while they were doing something much more fun than consoling a hormonal, lonely, pregnant girl.

But a few days went by and I did get a few text messages. I also put flannel sheets on the bed, went grocery shopping, did our taxes, and dropped a bunch of crap off at Goodwill. I had to clean the house since Andrew and I spent time doing fun stuff on his last few days. I almost want to leave his dirty uniform on the floor :) makes it seem like he is still here. Other than that I've been using music to keep me busy. I did an open mic on Thursday and played a very last minute show on Friday. Both went well but I definitely want to start making MONEY.

Yesterday was a little hard for me though. I started thinking about giving birth, which I try to avoid doing because it makes me sad knowing that I probably won't get to share that moment with my husband. And makes me a little bit angry thinking about how someone else might get to share it with me, but they could never appreciate it the way that Andrew would. I feel like he is the only person in the world who really deserves to be there with me. I talked to my mom because I've been unsure on whether or not she's willing to help me, or to what extent... We talked and I realize that as much as she wants to be, she is not someone that I can count on when the time comes. So I'm going to have to improvise, which lucky for me, I am pretty good at.

I've been worried about SO many things. Who is going to drive me to the hospital once I go into labor? How will I get home from the hospital with my baby if someone drops me off there? Who do I choose to be in the delivery room with me if my husband can't be there? And today I just had this beautiful thought and I decided, I don't care!!! I don't care how I get to the hospital! 911 is my last resort and I'm not afraid to use it. And I don't care how I get home! My family is busy but I'm sure they'll find time to visit me in the hospital and help me figure out a way to bring baby home. And this changes frequently, but as of right now, I don't want anyone in the delivery room with me! Just doctors and maybe someone to take a couple pictures. As long as I get to hold my healthy baby in the end, I refuse to let anything else stress me out. Its not like no one has done this before. There are plenty of military wives that get stuck in places far from family, and have to deliver alone. And if they can do it, I can do it. Heck, with all the experience I've gained of successfully doing new things by myself, I can probably do it better!

Today I am 25 weeks along. I read online that at 25 weeks, babies are likely to survive if they're born premature because their lungs are developed enough to breathe!! The most premature baby to be born and live was only 21 weeks and 6 days old. This is amazing news to me. It warms my heart to know that I'm that far along. Its hard for me sometimes because I don't have a huge belly like most women do at this stage and it makes me feel like I'm not that pregnant. It also makes me understand the show "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant". My next appointment with my midwife is on Valentines Day. The day after my birthday!! It makes me so happy, like I have a Valentine's Day date with my little man.

why do they call us "dependents" again?

Today is the first day of my husband's deployment, and I am strangely calm about our situation. If you'd asked me a week ago what today would be like, I would never have guessed that I would be sitting on the couch, watching tv shows about babies and chatting online with my mom, like I normally would if my husband was at work on a regular day. I imagined a much mopier me, with runny mascara, a huge frown, and a mouth full of Ben & Jerry's.

I really thought that saying goodbye would be one of the hardest things we'd have to do in this deployment, and if I'm right, this isn't going to be so bad. I dropped my husband off this morning around 5AM and our goodbye was eased with reminders that I would get to talk to him again very soon. That's not how deployments normally work, but since the boat that my husband will be working on left San Diego over a month ago, today will be a day of flying, not ...cruising (I think thats what they call it). He is flying to meet the boat at a port overseas, so he will be able to call me a couple times today until he gets to his final destination.

I could not be more thankful for my husband. He works so hard and puts all of his effort into what he does! He is one of the few people out there that can do anything because he is willing to work extremely hard to get whatever he wants. And so far its definitely paid off! Its amazing how much growing up we have done in the past few years together. I feel like all the people that havent seen me within the past two years, don't even know me anymore. Even the people who knew Drew and I when we started dating couldn't possibly understand how far we've come emotionally and financially since we got married. Which all leads me to the conclusion that couples who are extremely confident about their relationships are probably WAY more likely to survive deployments together (along with other difficult times that are sure to come).

There are so many articles on how military marriages have higher divorce rates than civilian marriages. They say its because women marry for money, and because military members tend to marry younger, and because the long deployments are too much for these weak relationships. For some reason I feel like I can laugh at all these statistics and all the people who immediately stereotype young military wives as soon-to-be divorced gold diggers.

Its also funny to me because I've met so many strong women who are in very happy relationships. In fact, most of the military wives I know are dealing with deployment right now. I think what most people don't think about is the fact that when our husbands are gone, we have to be two people! We have to do everything for ourselves and everything for our husbands. We pay all the bills and credit cards, we take care of the house, we take care of the vehicles, we sign what needs to be signed, we make ALL the decisions of the household! The wives that can successfully manage all of this and still have a stress relieving hobby or two are the strongest, most independent women you will ever meet! Besides, we are the ones keeping all those service members happy (your welcome for indirectly serving this lovely country).

Ok, so I went off on a tangent. Back to how I feel about this deployment... I am ok with this! I can do this! We were given enough time to prepare this (and I think we used it wisely) and we were given information on helpful resources in case we do need it.

Keep in mind, I do have extra mood-swing-causing hormones thanks to pregnancy and a tendency to feel sad when I get too bored, so yes, my opinion on this deployment could very possibly change in an instant. But as for now, Drew and I are both confident that this will just be another event in our marriage that we can conquer and call ourselves stronger for getting through.

Wish me luck!

My Current Adventures...

Many big new things are happening in my life right now. I've been married for a year and a half now. My husband, Andrew, and I just moved from Charleston, South Carolina, to San Diego, CA. We are very glad to be back in Southern California, since we met and got married just an hour and a half north of here. So this was our second cross country move. And it was even more complicated than the first because my husband had temporary duty in Connecticut for almost three months. For most of the time that he was in Connecticut, I was in California looking for a good place to start renting (the base housing in San Diego isn't as good as it was in Charleston so we decided to look elsewhere), finding venues and coffee shops to play at (I'm a singer/songwriter), and also finding a good doctor for myself. Why do I need a good doctor? I'm pregnant! And if that doesnt complicate things, then I don't know what does!

I stayed with my parents while house hunting and dealing with the fatigue and nausea of pregnancy's first trimester. Amazingly enough, it took me less than a month to find the PERFECT (or nearly at least somewhat perfect) place for us to live. It had all the main things we wanted; three bedrooms, attached garage, laundry hook-ups, and it wasnt in an appartment complex! We were approved to start renting right away.

But I still had to switch my health insurance and find a doctor and all that. And when you're a navy wife with military health insurance, NO ONE to tell you what to do, and raging preggo hormones, it can be quite difficult. But after 2 months of leaving about a hundred voicemails all over Balboa's hospital, someone decided to call me back and help me set up an appointment. It was all pretty frustrating, but I now have a midwife and am getting great prenatal care.

I had no furniture and no husband in my new home in San Diego, so I flew to Connecticut and stayed with my husband in a navy hotel for a month. It was great, I took lots of naps, played wii (we bought one while we were there), and was able to catch a prenatal fitness class, where I met some other preggo navy wives.

So far I've only been to two different places in San Diego that have open mic nights. I've done them each twice and met some local musicians that I really like. I am actually scheduled to play a show with a couple local musicians on the 22nd of this month. Maybe I will blog about it later. Anyway, there is a lot of talent out here but I feel like I fit in quite well so far. Hopefully I can get a couple paid gigs before this baby comes. I don't feel like getting a "real" job. Especially since I am nearly 5 months along now and I am starting to show. Who wants to hire someone knowing they're going to quit in 4 months?

Anyway, that pretty much sums up what is going on in my life right now. Expect to see more on deployment, music, and baby Henry, in the near future.